6 weeks + a heartbeat

God continues to blow me away.  about half way through last week i started to get a little antsy sorta stressing and wondering if we would even be able to see a heart beat come yesterday's appointment... 

as if God hasn't already taught me many times in recent past that he's got this baby and everything {really} under his control. 

so i began over thinking and googling the likelihood of seeing a heartbeat at a 6 week appointment.... i was also concerned that even though we saw the gestational sac last week that there wouldn't be a baby visible this week.  a friend of mine with an "old fashioned pregnancy" went for her first ultrasound at 8wks and they didn't see a baby, then went in for a 10wk with her doc thinking they were just off on the conception date.  but they still didn't find a baby in the empty gestational sac and that certainly was not the news they hoped to hear.  so that of course got me a little concerned 

about both of these things for this week.

so yesterday as soon as Dr. Mo started the ultrasound she said "there's a flicker!" and sure enough there was a tiny little heartbeat to which I said "no way!!" that she found it that quickly, easily, and it was crazy yet again to be shown God's goodness, despite my silly ability to doubt his faithfulness.

i guess i'm just still a little in shock that we're pregnant, and that this little one is progressing wonderfully so far!  and apparently i'm still supposed to be learning how to relinquish control of this child to the one who's given this amazing gift i expected was still a ways off in the future.

so here's our little miracle that according to my app is the size of a pea right now... oh and they gave us a tentative due date of October 15th, 2 days before my mom's bday!

it's kinda funny because i remember reading blogs of other IF ladies thinking man when i'm pregnant i will not obsess over everything and will just enjoy that i'm pregnant... haha easier said than done!  and it makes sense since a friend said that her OB recently told her it's a maternal instinct to have concern for your baby while still in utero and that you always will as a mom, even more so once they're born.

so last night i went to bed feeling so blown away by the little miracle growing inside me, and that God is so faithful by continuing to proving to me He's in control with his promises for 

"a hope and a future" as a mom.